Russell Davies

help is at hand

just incase you can't find a shade of ecru that works with beige. the gap stylists are here to help.

signs of the times

playmobil now make an airport security playset.

and they've staged some kind of riot/police operation in the window of hamleys.

rule britannia

Here's a sign that Britain still is top nation. This is my favourite road sign, one you see around occasionally. We must be top nation if we still have road signs which assume the population is literate enough to understand the phrase 'adverse camber'. Two words hardly anyone ever uses.

I didn't take this picture. I did an image search on Google and it's from a personal site of an American visitor who clearly found the sign puzzling. Apologies to him if he discovers my appropriation.

Hurrah for the DoT and their high expectations of motorist vocabulary.

corporate apology

a tremendous sign over at funkypancake has reminded me of the perfect corporate endline we once wrote.

I was working in the states at the time. It was the sad end of the dotcom boom and every pitch we did seemed to be for some terrible service company. It was all telecoms or technology or something. People with rubbish helpdesks. People who'd built an enormous global corporation before they'd become actually good at anything. And it occured to us that they should simply pre-apologise for everything. Since their relationships with customers were inevitably going to be based on let-down and failure, the simplest thing would be to get it out of the way upfront, and try and get on the same side as the customer. Thus we thought of 'we're just as disappointed as you are'. It's perfect. You can just see it:

'BT: We're just as disappointed as you are'

or

'NTL: We're just as disappointed as you are'

It'd work wouldn't it? You just wouldn't bother complaining, becuase you'd know what response you'd get. And you'd somehow feel like they were on your side. It's you and the global corporation against some other. It wasn't their fault, it was fate or something. Because that's the only satisfaction you get with a helpdesk. The only way they can make you happy is if they take your side against 'the system'. This way the whole company does a corporate shrug and roll of the eyes upfront.

I wish we'd presented it to someone. Just as a laugh. But we never had the guts.

the horror

Here it is, in a single ad, everything that's wrong with the world. Or is that putting it too strong? No. Look at it. 'Generations of Excellence' What are they talking about? And look at those clothes. Jeez. And that kid.

off brand

This is the back of an abercrombie and fitch t-shirt. It's a great quote. But it's interesting because it's not on brand for Churchill or A&F.

teen machine

ToysRUs have also invented this rather ungainly jargon - teentronics. Presumably they mean the kind of surly electronics which only work when they want to. Ha ha.

what, absolutely no chance?

I saw this at toys 'r' us at the weekend. How bad a design does this have to be? So bad that it demands this kind of warning. It's one of those Amstrad phone/emailler things. You almost take it as a challenge, just to see if it can be done.

showstudio

taking liberty's is a great project from showstudio. the signs explain it all really. i took these a while back but was reminded of it by things.

and this is me. 12 noon on Feb 26th. very cold day. on my way to a meeting.

beautiful and/or sad

Saw this this morning in Great Titchfield Street